Surprise, Surprise
by sonicstardust
Summary: Unfinished McAbby pregfic. It's awful. Probably will never be finished. Only keeping up here because a few people seemed to like it.
1. Beginnings

_Author's Note: This is based on a weird dream I had forever ago (and a something that was said in 4x01 "Shalom"), and I've been wondering how it would turn out if I wrote it as a fic, so here it is. Don't make fun of me too much for it. It's set sometime after the beginning of season 4._

**Chapter 1**

Abby sighed and closed her eyes. _Okay, deep breath,_ she told herself. _What's the worst he could say anyway?_

"Hey, um, Tim?" she began again. "Do you remember that one time, a couple months ago when we were _just_ gonna watch a movie at my place, but then we...didn't cause we found a better way to–uh–occupy the time?" she chattered. "Well...I suck at this...dammit." she told her bathroom mirror, frustrated. Abby turned on the faucet and splashed her face, causing the remnants of yesterday's makeup to run down her cheeks in watered-down black streaks.

"Note to self," she muttered, drying her eyes on a towel and giving her disheveled reflection a scrutinizing gaze, "get this over with, _quickly_."

---

When Abby arrived at the NCIS office early that morning, it was empty; not an uncommon occurrence, considering that her boss, Gibbs, had probably already been in and already gone out to get today's first cup of coffee.

She hung up her coat, put her lunch box in the fridge, and sat down at her desk with her usual morning box of donuts and jumbo sized _Caff-Pow!_. _Like it's just another day_.

As she finished her breakfast the phone rang, and caller ID showed her coworker, Tony DiNozzo's desk number.

Abby hit the speaker phone button. "Hi Tony, what can I do for you this morning?" she asked, and even though she tried to sound cheerful, it came out sounding dull and miserable.

"Hey Abbs," Tony replied, apparently not noticing that she wasn't her normal exuberant self, "Gibbs wants the tox results _soon_ and he's gonna kick _my_ ass if I don't have them for him pronto."

Abby smiled. "Come on Tony, it can't be that bad."

She could hear a derisive snort from the other end of the line. "Of course it could be, and is. I mean, Gibbs went to get his coffee and the machine was broken, so he's pretty much–"

"Who's 'Pretty much' what, DiNozzo?" Gibbs's growl came muffled through the receiver.

"I'll send someone down to get the results, Abbs." Tony said quickly.

Abby grinned, feeling somewhat better. "Okay. Wait–don't hang up! Is McGee in yet?"

"Yeah, think so. You need him for something in particular?"

"Nothing. I was just curious–but could you send him down anyway? 'Kay, bye." she hung up, and sat back glumly.

Being confused and upset always brought one thing to her mind; the death of her best friend, and confidante.

_Kate, if you were here you'd be the first one I'd talk to,_ she thought, heaving a sigh. _I could use my best friend just about now._

Abby took several gulps of _Caff-Pow!_, then got up and paced back and forth in an anxious manner for a few minutes before she heard the lab door.

"Hey Abby."

She spun around to see Tim smiling sheepishly.

"Oh, hey McGee...what's up?"

He looked confused. "Uhh, I don't know Abbs, You're the one who wanted to see me, right? That's what Tony said."

"Right." Abby gulped; her stomach felt queasy. "Well, Tim, uhh..." the forensic scientist grimaced. "I don't feel so great." she clapped a hand over her mouth and rushed out. Abby reached the bathroom in time, and vomited into the sink.

_Damn, _Caff-Pow! _tastes like watered down cough syrup on the way back up._ She gripped the sides of the basin, hands shaking. "Crap."

"Abby?" a hand rested on her shoulder.

She closed her eyes and cleared her throat. "Hey Ziva." She turned to face the former Mossad officer.

"Are you alright?" she asked, her eyebrows knitted in concern.

Abby grabbed a paper towel, wiped her mouth, and forced a smile. "Yeah. Guess I caught some sort of flu bug." she laughed nervously.

Ziva didn't look convinced, but patted Abby's shoulder awkwardly. "Okay. Feel better, Abby." she made for the door.

"Ziva?"

The other woman paused. "Yes?"

Abby twirled one of her black pigtails. "I don't have the flu, but I do need to tell _someone_ what's going on."

---


	2. Spill It

_DISCLAIMER: Yes, I forgot this in the first chapter, but isn't not owning what you're writing about the point of fanfiction? Soo yah, I don't own NCIS, Donald Bellisario and CBS do._

_---_

**Chapter 2**

Ziva frowned thoughtfully as she let what Abby had just told her sink in. "What about Gibbs? Does Gibbs know?" she finally asked.

Abby shook her head, crossing her arms. "No. You're the only person who I've had the guts to tell–unless you count my cat, who won't be telling anyone–and that reminds me, can _you_ not tell anyone–please?"

Ziva shook her head. "I won't. But that doesn't mean they won't figure it out eventually–that is, depending on what you plan to do. It's your decision, but I think...I think you should tell _him_."

Abby shrugged her shoulders, feeling somewhat relieved in finding someone to confide in, but realizing that she did have to make a decision. One she knew she couldn't make on her own.

Someone rapped on the bathroom door. "Abby? You okay?"

She wiped her watering eyes and called, "Yeah, Tim. I'm fine now. Out in a minute."

Ziva gave her a quizzical look.

Abby nodded dully. "See you later," she sighed, "and thanks."

The other woman nodded. "Good luck, Abbs."

Abby gave a half-smile, pushed open the bathroom door, and parted ways with Ziva in the hall.

McGee had been waiting outside for her. "Do you want me to give you a ride home?" he offered as he walked her back to the lab.

Abby shook her head, fighting down the urge to burst into tears and spill everything. "I'm okay Timmy." she insisted. "But thanks."

Once in the lab, Abby turned to McGee, who was still standing reluctantly in the doorway. "I think I need a hug." she told him, feeling pathetic.

He shrugged, smiled, and held out his arms to her.

Abby buried her face in his shoulder and wrapped her arms around his neck. _Tell him,_ said a little voice in the back of her mind.

She sniffed and pulled away. "I need your help with this one set of codes." she blurted out.

"What?"

"The codes. From Lieutenant Saunders's computer system?"

McGee looked confused. "I thought you were done with those..."

Abby crossed her arms. "Well...can't I come up with a shitty excuse to keep you down here every now and then?" she sulked, stomping back over to sit at her desk.

"_Abbs_." He said in an exasperated tone, rolling his eyes, then when he realized that she was genuinely upset, added. "I'm sorry Abby," he went over to her and kissed her on the head. "I'll stay."

"Good." She forced a watery smile, taking his hand and swinging it back and forth a little. "Tim?"

"Yeah?"

Abby took a breath. "I...uh...I'm pregnant." she squeezed her eyes shut, hoping he would take it well.

Tim McGee's eyes widened. "Seriously?" he stopped her from swinging their hands.

Abby opened one eye. "Yup."

They were silent for a long, awkward moment.

Abby sniffed, wiping her eyes. "What are we gonna do?" her voice broke.

McGee blinked, "Wow." he breathed.

"This basically sucks." Abby managed, wiping her makeup-streaked face.

He shook his head. "Nah," He took both of her hands in his. "Abbs, if you wanna do this–it could be kind of cool."

Abby looked surprised. "Really?" she took a deep breath. "I just think I'll make a crappy mom." she smiled, though there were still tears in her eyes. "I mean, what if neither of us are ready for this?"

Tim shook his head. "It'll be fine." he assured her.

Abby nodded, blowing her nose and regaining her composure. "Okay."

"Okay."


	3. Something to Talk About

_Author's Note: Short chapter, mainly just to fill it out. Many thanks to reviewers!_

_Disclaimer: No ownage here. That privelige belongs to Donald Bellisario._

**Chapter 3**

"Heya Probie, where ya goin'?" Tony reclined lazily in his desk chair, taking a large bite of the meatball sub in his hand.

McGee shrugged nervously and pulled his coat on the rest of the way. "What? Am I not allowed to go out to lunch, Tony?"

Agent DiNozzo grinned. "I dunno, what do you think _Ziva_? Is McGee _allowed_?" he tossed his sandwich wrapper over onto his coworker's desk.

She looked up from her work in an irritated manner, picked up the wad of paper and deposited it in her wastebasket. "I think McGee should be permitted go out to lunch if he so chooses." she replied, giving Tim a nod and a smile.

He smiled back. "Thank you, Ziva." He gave Tony a smug look.

"Well, if ya ask me, he looks a little jumpy." Tony observed in a patronizing voice, turning to Ziva and using his fingers to indicate 'a little'.

Tim rolled his eyes. "See you later." he muttered, grabbing his keys and striding to the elevators.

Tony raised an eyebrow. "What's up with him?"

"I don't know." Ziva sighed tiredly, rubbing her temples.

Tony got up from his desk and strolled casually over to Ziva's. He tried to catch her eye, but she wouldn't look at him.

"What do you know?" he asked, watching her suspiciously.

Ziva widened her eyes innocently, giving him a blank look. "Nothing–"

"Spill, David."

She sighed, leaned back from her paperwork, then motioned for Tony to lean in to talk to her. "I..." she said after a long silence, "I have an idea."

"Yeah?"

Ziva grinned, as Tony waited expectantly, only inches from her. "Tony...I never said I would tell you."

---

Abby furrowed her brow, her eyes scanned the tall bookshelf in a small coffee shop near the office.

"Abbs."

She spun around to find herself facing McGee. "Hey." she said, smiling.

"Whatcha lookin' for?"

She shrugged. "Books."

"Heh, that's kinda obvious, Abbs." Tim replied, looking the shelf up and down.

Abby bit her lip nervously as he raised an eyebrow at the titles he read. "Abby, you're looking at parenting books?"

She shrugged and heaved a sigh. "Yeah," she plucked a book from the shelf half-heartedly. "I told you, I'd make a crappy mom." Abby let Tim pull her into a brief hug.

"Come on," he told her, trying to give a reassuring smile, even though he wasn't feeling his most confident about this either, "Let's get something to eat, then we'll talk about it."


	4. What Do You Think It Means?

_Author's Note: Thanks so much to reviewers! You are loved! So within the next few chapters it's basically gonna be members of the team finding out, so if you have any suggestions, that would rock, cause I love when people give me ideas!_

* * *

**Chapter 4**

The final decision was to wait. After the baby was born they would most likely move in together, but for now they would wait it out until they couldn't hide it anymore. Then, they agreed, then people could know what was going on.

There was one person, however, who _always _knew things before he was told. He just knew. Within the next few months, Gibbs had his suspicions.

It was on a rainy afternoon in the middle of a high-priority case. Gibbs a slammed a fresh _Caff-Pow!_ down onto the table next to Abby's microscope, causing her to jump.

"Got anything yet, Abbs?"

The scientist took her eye away from the microscope and gave her boss an exasperated look. "Geez Gibbs! No more coffee for you today. Anyways, you asked me that about the last fifty leaves I compared. None of the ones you collected from Lieutenant Gainer's car match the leaves on the victim's clothes, or the ones collected from around the scene. You're looking for an entirely different tree, and a rare one at that." She grabbed a printed sheet from the desk and presented it to him.

Gibbs took the paper, sighed and nodded, drumming his fingers on his coffee cup. "Okay. Well?" he asked expectantly, "How about the bullet? Can you tell me who's gun it was fired from?"

Abby got up to get the bullet as Gibbs eyed the pile-up of _Caff-Pow!_'s that had accumulated around the lab.

"What's the matter? They don't make them like they used to?"

Abby set down the evidence jar in her hand, which contained a small caliber bullet. "Uh...I think I'm just losing my taste for insanely caffeinated red sodas, Gibbs." she gave him what she hoped was a winning smile.

"Uh-huh, and Tony decided that movies are a juvenile pastime." he replied sarcastically.

"You said yourself that too much caffeine isn't good for me." Abby carried a tray of leaf samples over to the aluminum table and put them down, watching Gibbs take another long sip of coffee. _How can I tell him? He's like my second dad–or maybe a really cool uncle...But it's still awkward, even though we're so close._

Gibbs dropped one of her old drinks into the trash. "You want something else instead? I'm sending Tony out for more coffee soon."

Abby barely had to think. "Actually strawberry ice cream sounds good right now–not the kind with real strawberries though–the really fake pink kind. And some pretzels." she told him as she checked to see if the bullet had any hits in the databases she was running it through.

The silver haired agent raised an eyebrow. "You sure you don't want pickles or something with your ice cream?"

Abby stopped what she was doing and squinted her eyes at him. "What do you know?" she articulated, watching him suspiciously.

Gibbs stared back at her innocently. "'What do I know' about what, Abby?"

Her green eyes widened. "Wait–you _do _know? Or you _don't _know and _really _don't know what you're supposed to _not _know?"

Gibbs chuckled. "What?"

She turned back to her work. "Nothing." she said quickly.

Gibbs came up closer behind her. "Am I right?" he asked quietly.

"Depends on what you think you're right about." she looked thoughtful. Y'know I don't want ice cream, I want Oreos. With caramel syrup."

Gibbs rolled his eyes. "Abby, are we supposed to be playing a guessing game?"

"Well if you want we could play Charades." she suggested, then held up one finger.

He grinned. "One word."

Abby mimed holding something in her arms and rocking it back and forth.

"Baby."


	5. Conference

_Author's Note: Okay, so I know this is a really short chapter, but again, I needed something to fill it out a little._

* * *

**Chapter 5**

Tony tapped his pencil impatiently, holding the phone between his ear and shoulder. "Yes, I'm still here," he replied, as a voice finally came through the line. He had been on hold for ten minutes.

"Oookay, yeah...Thanks anyway." he hung up after a moment of listening, exasperation clouding his features.

Ziva peered over at him from her desk. "What's wrong?"

Tony massaged his temples and rolled his shoulders. "Well, apart from the fact that I've been here all night, _and_ that this guy's previous arrest file is conveniently misplaced or missing–"

"So in other words...You're pissed, and we have nothing to go on?"

"Yeah, in other words."

Gibbs strode into the bullpen, an inexplicable smile spread across his face.

Tony and Ziva gave each other looks of equal concerned curiosity.

The older agent sat down at his desk, put on his glasses, and began to go over some papers, still looking unnervingly cheerful.

McGee, who had been on his way to his own desk slowed his gait as he got closer. Perceiving that something was a little hinky, he watched the other three. He leaned over the side of the barrier next to Tony's desk. "What's going on?" he asked quietly.

Tony jerked his chin towards Gibbs and pretended to go back to work.

Tim watched his boss, who looked over and gave the young man a serene gaze.

He stood, strolled towards the elevator, and motioned for Timothy to follow.

Ziva raised her eyebrows, giving Tony a 'what the hell is happening, and should we know about it?' look, but said nothing.

McGee shrugged, and walked after his boss.

Gibbs entered the elevator, waited for McGee to do the same, then once the doors had closed behind him, pushed the emergency stop button. He turned to the youngest agent on his team.

Tim watched Gibbs's steel-blue eyes, and realization dawned on him. "You know something, don't you boss?"

He let out a good-natured chuckle. "C'mon Tim, I already played this game. Yeah, I know. I talked to Abby."

"You do?--I mean you did?"

"Yep."

McGee sighed. "Listen boss, it may seem like it was all just a one-time thing with unexpected consequences, but I think this could work. I know you may not believe me, but I genuinely–"

Gibbs nodded. "Do you love her?"

Tim swallowed, then also nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, I do, boss."

Gibbs hit his favorite button once again, and the lights and power came back on with a mechanical grating sound. "Good. 'Cause if you hurt her, you'll sure as hell have me to answer to." he clapped Tim on the shoulder, and as the elevator chime signaled their arrival, and the doors opened, he strolled out.

McGee reluctantly exited, feeling relieved that Gibbs had taken it well, and also thankful that Gibbs would never _have_ to carry out his threat.

Tony and Ziva looked up from their desks, obviously expecting an explanation, but Gibbs simply gave them a nod and went back to work.

They looked to Tim, who still hung back by the elevator.

He smiled, turned, and pressed the button that would take him down to the lab.

---

_Many thanks to reviewers! Please give me some feedback so I know what to do next!_


	6. Geek Love

_Author's Note: I really don't know how many chapters I ought to have, but here's a little fluffy bit of fluffness for ya!_

**Chapter 6**

The next week, Abby called McGee at his desk during work. "Come down here," she told him excitedly, "I have something I want to show you."

Tim glanced around, but his coworkers weren't paying him much attention. "I'm working on something Abbs, can this wait?"

She was silent a moment, then grumbled. "Okay."

He hated to hear the disappointment in her voice. "Look Abby," he said, trying to make up for not being able to get there that moment, "I'll come down before lunch, see what you want to show me, then I'll take you out to eat–wherever you want, okay?"

Another short silence, but when she replied, McGee could tell she was smiling. "Alright. See you in a little bit."

He grinned and hung up, then was startled to find himself face-to-face with Tony DiNozzo.

"Aha," Tony chortled, leaning back from Tim, and stroking his chin thoughtfully.

McGee sighed and sat back in his chair, ready to endure whatever snarky remark Tony was about to make. "What, Tony?"

He paced back and forth, obviously relishing the moment. "So, McGeek and the Queen of the Night are back together."

"Ahh," he sighed, "Geek Love."

Ziva rolled her eyes at him. "Tony, get back to work before–"

A wad of paper bounced off of the back of Agent DiNozzo's head. "You better have something good for me." Gibbs told him as he stalked to his desk.

"Actually, I got chicken teriyaki and wonton soup–didn't know which you would like better boss." Tony held up a carton of Chinese carry-out.

"I was talking about the case." Gibbs snatched the food from Tony.

"Actually that one was–"

A death-glare from Gibbs.

"Never mind, boss."

---

"Abby?" McGee called as he entered the lab, glancing around for any sign of the forensic scientist.

"Timmy!" Abby poked her head around the corner of the ballistics lab. "Check out what's on the computer at my desk, I'll be done with this in a minute." she held up a jar with several rounds in it.

He nodded and walked to the computer. What he saw was a web page decked out with black and red baby bottles, spiders, and bats. "Goth baby stuff?" he muttered to himself, mildly amused; he'd always pictured his offspring in pale pink or blue, basic, generic baby clothes.

The particular item that had been selected was an intricate looking black crib mobile with little stuffed cats hanging from it.

"Cute, huh?" Abby commented, suddenly right over his shoulder.

McGee chuckled. "Yeah, I guess, but this is supposed to be for a baby, not you."

Abby gave his shoulder a playful punch. "Come on, be open minded, it's my kid too." She got behind him and put her arms over his shoulders so she could type. "I wanted to show you this too." she said, her face right next to his ear.

Another item appeared; this time it was a black and white baby t-shirt that read 'Parental Advisory: Explicit Content'.

"See?" Abby said gleefully, "It's exactly like mine! Plus–the baby could wear it whether it's a girl or a boy."

Tim grinned and turned his head, their faces were inches apart.

"So you like it?" she returned his grin.

"Yeah,"

They kissed, and for a moment at least, all of McGee's worries and concerns about how all this would turn out, vanished. Everything felt right.


	7. FantasyDaydreams

_A/N: Here's a little chapter (is there any other kind in this story?), with some Tiva banter included!! _

* * *

**Chapter 7**

After a few suspicious absences due to doctor's appointments, Abby thought she was doing a rather good job of keeping her 'not-so-secret' secret, but one day, she noticed something that could possibly blow everything, and called Ziva downstairs to ask her what she thought.

She turned to the side and made a face. "Can you tell? Cause I totally think you can tell." Abby pulled her shirt tighter around her middle and straightened her back to emphasize.

Ziva crossed her arms and tipped her head to the side. "A little, but if you wore a baggy shirt no one would be the wiser."

Abby shrugged and got her lab-coat down from its hook on the wall. "If by 'no one', you mean Tony, I don't think it'll be much longer before I either have to tell him, or drop a blatant hint so when he figures it out he can feel clever."

The Israeli woman prodded at a knick-knack atop of the lab's many computers. "That may be the best plan, after all, I suppose he'd be a little put out if he found out he was the last to know."

Abby gave a short laugh. "You're right. Poor Tony is currently out of the pregnancy-knowledge loop." She straightened the collar of her white lab-coat and sighed, exhausted, despite the fact that she'd fallen asleep long before the 11 o'clock news last night.

Ziva checked her watch. "I'd better get going. See you later Abbs." she gave a small wave as she walked out quickly, set on not dooming herself to be the one to get Gibbs in a bad mood today.

---

Anthony DiNozzo, the only one at his desk at that time, glanced up as his pretty co-worker strolled out of the elevator and into the bullpen, wearing the slightly smug smile that had so often come to inhabit her face nowadays.

"Where ya been, Zee-vah?" he overemphasized, tapping his pen lazily.

Ziva dropped her bag behind her desk, and took a seat. "To see Abby," she replied nonchalantly, "she wanted my opinion on something."

Tony closed the folder on his desk and gave her a smirk. "Since when are _you _into girl-talk, Officer David?"

She made a face at him, and busied herself with checking her e-mail.

"So what'd you guys talk about?"

Ziva peered around her computer screen. "Wouldn't you _love_ to know." she teased.

He thought for a moment. "Actually yes," he told her, "that _was_ why I asked."

Ziva stared at him innocently. "Well perhaps we were giggling like little schoolgirls about how...sexy, and distracting our Agent DiNozzo is."

Tony chuckled, then propped his chin up on his palms, looking thoughtful.

Ziva grinned. "I'm surprised you don't have anything to say to that."

He shook his head, obviously distracted by his thoughts. "Nah, I'm just picturing you two in Catholic school-girl uniforms."

Ziva rolled her eyes, picked up a pencil cap eraser, and threw it in his general direction.

The eraser bounced off his head and shattered his daydream. "Fine, be that way," he grumbled, straightening his papers in what he must have thought was a professional manner, "but next time _you _have a fantasy/daydream, I request that you leave me out of it."

"Why?" asked Ziva playfully, "Afraid you'll be the one in a pleated miniskirt next time?"


End file.
